seeing those happy married couple outside makes me feel envy toward them. Bcs till now i don't get a chance to meet a guy who can makes me be the happiest girl on earth and make it forever. All i got is my life turns upside down bcs of love. Guy just easily come and go. Nobody stay. How the one i loved ruined my life and i have to be strong just to feel okay again. How i wish the scars tht he left in me just disappear without need anyone to fix it. I'm not hoping that he will come and we both become like before, i just want someone will come into my life and erase all that shitty little things out.

But somehow i don't feel like I'm ready yet to fall in love again. The pain that he put me through seems never go.

despite that I trust Allah. I trust Him. He can give me the best man beyond the best. I just too young to know about "forever"

This is not an sympathic post. Forgive me.

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